MAHDI STFU!

 

 

 

We knew this would happen. In an internet world of half-baked conclusions some guy jumping up, talking slow, and weaving a tapestry of deception was inevitable. He says that he’s the Mahdi, whatever the hell that is, and he supplants Jesus, Mohammed, and the Beatles all at the same time and lemmings of the world united, went down on their knees and empowered this Jack-a-lope as he rambled on from his Sears and Roebuck chair somewhere in Kirk Stupidstan.

According to his holy utterance Pope Francis was slain by the bad breath of these followers. Never mind that the Pope was eighty-eight years old, had just got out of hospital, and was sick as hell. This ranks right on up there with Joseph Smith’s prophecy predicting The Civil War.

And this cat has it all. I think he came out of Chicago, and that ain’t good. Eventually he linked up with Islam, and that’s even worse, and he dresses in black. Bada Bing Bada Boom! Then all the religious nuts came out of the woodwork and cried, “Oh shit! It’s the AntiChrist!” I thought it had already been decided that Donald Trump was the AntiChrist.

So he sits up there like a trained monkey and gets farther out in left field every day and claims he has a worldwide following. I’ve checked his numbers. That blonde chick with a bandaid across her nose  from America’s Got Talent beats his numbers on Tik Tok alone. Perhaps he should take her advice and shut the fuck up! 

Jesus told us these guys would appear. This one says Francis was a false Pope. Does that mean that he recognizes the legitimacy of the Catholic Church? Kinda unusual for a prophet of Islam. And wasn’t Mohammed supposed to be the prophet to end all prophets? I smell a Fatwa in the air.

Someone even tried to claim this guy’s name was in the Qu’ran. And he ain’t dead yet? Muslims don’t even allow pictures of Mohammed and this guy’s knocking him off that silly rock in the Mosque of Omar. As my readers know, I have opinions about that. Second Temple . . .Mosque of Omar . . . Super Walmart, but hey! Whatever floats their boat.

Ok, for the gist. This clown isn’t a holy anything! He’s just one more internet con just like all those little girls you been looking at on Threads that you don’t want the Po Po to find out about. Everybody has a God Hole in their head and you gotta fill it with something. Most people fill it with whatever they understand God to be. Jesus, Allah, Krishna, take your pick. And some fill it with God Damn! Like this guy in his fancy chair with a WIFI hookup. You wanna get my attention turn this cup of coffee into a Budweiser. Better yet, fix my ED and hook me up with a UT Coed.

I got some prophecy for you. Right out of Detroit:

All through the shadows
Watch 'em come and watch 'em go, oh they go
With only one thing in common
They got the fire down below!

Hey Mahdi! When you get there tell Hitler I said, “Hi!”