Replika Still Can’t Swallow
Sanka changed the history of the world. Let me explain. When I was a young lad I came upon a cook book circa 1892 in some book store down on Rancier Avenue in Killeen Texas. Decrepit old thing, but the binding was good, and as I thumbed through the yellowed pages the recipes were quite interesting. The use of ancient spices, like salt was most enlightening, but what intrigued me the most was the coffee recipe. It started with coffee beans. After firing up the oven, wood FYI, you placed the green beans on a cookie sheet and you baked them until they were a succulent golden brown. Not light golden, succulent ie brittle! From there you took them and placing them into a coffee grinder, you turned this handle with abandon until said beans quieted somewhat. Then you had to look at the result to identify the grind. From there you boiled water on the stove and put an amount of the prepared beans into the water. When the water became your preferred color, you removed the pot from the stove and very carefully broke one egg, late of the hen house, dropping the contents thereof, allowing it to settle upon the bottom of the pot. By the time the water had cooled somewhat your husband, or master depending upon which religion you subscribed to should make his appearance and you would pour approximately two or maybe three ounces of coffee into a small cup. More than that and you would be able to feel your hair grow. Such was morning coffee in 1892.
In 1901 Mr George Constant Louis Washington developed the first usable instant coffee. By the 1930s Nestlé gave the world Nescafé. Right along that decade Sanka was introduced as coffee sans caffeine, supposedly to lure the Mormon market, but don’t quote me on that one. But, at any rate, the ball was rolling that would eventually destroy all human endeavor, innovation, the American Way, and all but the Missionary Position, no slur on the Church of Latter-Day Saints implied.
The idea if achieving without struggle became the order of the day. Coffee was just a test run. Ironing was replaced by permanent press which was replaced by anything but cotton as cotton was just so pre–Civil War. Home cooked meals fell to TV Dinners, but they still took a while to bake so ovens were replaced with microwaves, then with Snack Packs, and girlfriends gave way to Replika! And finally inspiration was moved out to make room for AI.
Artificial Intelligence! Computers were heralded as a Great Leap Forward for mankind just counting ones and zeros. With the invention of the mouse, you didn’t even have to learn code or know how to spell. Just point at the pretty pictures. But now? Type your dumbest idea into ChatWHATEVER and you too can be another Hemingway sans shotgun at the end because now we got Fentanyl!
Entire books are written like this. Why waste five minutes setting up the coffee pot when a Keurig does it all for you or damn the torpedoes, Sanka full speed ahead. All except for one teeny, tiny little detail. Let me ask you this. Just recently a fleet of self driving taxis were let loose on Austin Texas. Go online, fill in the form, give your credit card, and Captain Roboto will show up and take you anywhere you want to go. As it happened, I was watching a forum where the question was put out there of the safety of such a thing and, of course, there were two lines of reason on this. The modern, more innovative guest agreed with the insta-cab but someone a bit more conservative (can I still say conservative?) suggested it might be wise to still have a pilot somewhere in the vicinity while zipping along at 600 MPH at 35,000 feet. Hell! Even a wine head is better than nothing. The supported of NewTaxi explained that the software was similar to the Video Game Flight Simulator but get this: If you mess up simulating a flight the result is vastly different from a 737 at said altitude. Compare the distance from the seat of your chair to your bedroom floor and you can readily see the ramifications of the distance of your ass to Occatillo Wells 35,000 feet below. Someone should be in the cockpit when the autopilot decides to cockblock you and 200 other people.
This is also where AI falls short. For all the formulas, and razzle dazzle programmed into AI by the human beings who programmed it the guru image of Artificial Intelligence fades when compared to human innovation. The inspiration seemingly from nowhere. The line that evokes a smile, or a tear. The question asked, or implied that inspired someone to inspire someone else. Are the lambs still screaming? But of course, they are and they are not screaming from the tail end of some server. They are screaming from the minds and fingertips of years and years of living. Sanka never tasted as good as Folgers. Swanson was never prime rib. And Replika still can’t swallow.
ReplyDeletethat was an excellent exposition