It All Depends On How You Look At It

 

It all depends on how you look at it. Perspective. Life is not two dimensional. It’s at least three, not counting the doctors, scientists, and astrophysicists who want us to try to believe that we are part of a universal cosmic game played by entities we choose to regard as gods. Solutions and understandings roll out by the thousands all capitalizing on man’s ability, or inability, which ever way you see it to connect the dots in your mind. And once you connect two of those dots you have a religion, or worse. Religion is accepting a concept beyond all reason and basing your life on it, all in the belief that when you die you will go to a place less fouled up than the place you left. Where at night you stare up at the stars and still can’t see the light. 

 

As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.

 

There was a reason Jesus said that. He said it because He knew he was dealing with us! He knew that our propensity to sin was unabated. Adam ate the forbidden fruit one hour after he was created. The very second Eve could get to the tree of forbidden knowledge. And the Bible says, “Their eyes were opened and they knew.” Knew what? That they were butt naked with perfect weather and free rent. Or did Adam suddenly realize that Eve was a beautiful underage naked girl. She was less than an hour old. 

 

And it wasn’t an apple. It was a fig. Don’t believe me? Take a fig and cut it lengthwise down the middle and YOU tell ME what it looks like. Take all the time you need. I’ll wait. The reason Jesus took so many stripes at Golgotha was our cup raneth over. The sign above Him only needed three letters. NXS! Because ever since Eve started seeing a snake talk man has been “In Excess!”

 

Man always over does things. God said, “Do not commit adultery.” Solomon had seven hundred wives of royal birth (not counting one-night stands), and three hundred concubines, and no Viagra! Tip of the hat for keeping Kosher. Pornography takes full advantage of this ingrained flaw. You are allowed to get married and enjoy each other. You are not allowed to watch scores of other people enjoying each other. And you really should keep the wives at a manageable number. When Adam got evicted from the apartment Eve went with him. No more mushrooms, no more talking snakes. 

 

And you know it’s wrong, but you can’t stop. The fall from grace is always a possibility. Have you ever noticed the particular sin famous evangelicals get snared in when they take a walk on the wild side? And I’m not passing judgement. When I took off down “Happiness Trail” I left a pretty blonde wife, two little boys, a trailer park and a dog to shack up with a woman in Long Island. What could possibly go wrong? When she dumped me I drove my pickup out into the desert until it ran out of gas and sat down under a cactus to die. And I raised my tear-stained face to the Lord and screamed, “Why me?” And the Lord said, “Because you had this one coming!”

 

And I did. There is one universal truth that all religions have, and that truth is you cannot save yourself! No more than a barrel of crabs can climb out of that barrel as they are pulled down by all the other crabs waiting to be cooked right along with them. You cannot pull yourself up by your own bootstraps. And that guru in India is not really floating in the air. 

 

So what to do? Look at all theologies. God made man, man made religion, and religion made theology. And theology has rules. Don’t eat this, don’t sleep with that, and don’t forget to look down your sacramonious nose at anyone outside of your holy safe zone. But, if you live by the law you must obey the law and if you don’t obey all the law, you just left a racing stripe in your Temple Garment for the Bishop to smell. You can’t do it! Nobody can. 

 

So, do you just give up? Eat that pie? Now you are beginning to understand why there were so many stripes on Jesus’s back. You can’t, He can, and WILL if you just understand that He really is the only way to The Father. It has become fashionable for other faiths to say they worship the same God. And they might. Or at least give it lip service. But they all dodge that “Jesus” thing. He’s a prophet, a messenger, a this, a that, anything but what He is. He is the way, the truth, and the light. And He was the reason I got out from under that cactus, got back in my truck, with the empty tank, and tried again. Did I sin again? Look! I’ve been in Country Music for over fifty years. What do you think? I’m no better than you, and I pray the prayer of the Prophet, Larry the Cable Guy often: Lord, I’m sorry I did that, I’ll try not to do that no more.